The story within you: womens archetypes
It was Easy like a Sunday mornin how I first met Irina. Her weekly blog column was a highlight of my weekend mornings long ago, when I would sip on freshly brewed coffee in my garden and immerse myself in her thought-provoking musings. Little did I know that years later, she would become one of my closest friends and sounding boards.
We may have taken different paths in life, but our bond remains unbreakable. We continue to nurture each other at our lowest and champion each other at our highest. Our shared curiosity, constant growth, and love for reading and self-improvement has kept us connected through the years. Irina and I are also both deeply passionate about another topic – the world of archetypes
Now, I’m thrilled to have her as a guest on our blog, where she’ll be opening up a new world of possibilities for us – the fascinating universe of women archetypes
I can’t wait for you to dive into this captivating realm and explore your own inner self.
Get cozy and enjoy!
My journey into archetypes
I’ve always loved stories and the fundamental concept of archetypes, and I know many people are familiar with the most popular of them: the Hero, the Alchemist, the Rebel, the Explorer, the Sage. This love has led me to many books, workshops, documentaries, training about archetypes, but I’ve found that while the standard archetypes are popular, they don’t always align with women’s experiences.
Until one day, when I had my first encounter with a femininity archetype on the pages of this remarkable book, “Women Who Run with Wolves”. Clarissa Pinkola-Estes’ collected stories, as well as her commentaries, reconstructed the Wild Woman blueprint: free from societal constraints, ardently valuing her life, connected to her intuition, soul and body, feeding her inner fire.
Months later, I was stepping into another world of archetypes via an enchanting 4-week lecture, taught by Monica Gaitanaru, a Romanian psycho-therapist. Hers interweaved descriptions of ancient Greek mythology goddesses with more modern models, based on Jungian psychology. This is how I learned about the Mother/ Caregiver (loving, protective and giving to the point of self-sacrifice, whose life is all about merging with her child or partner), about the Priestess / the Wise Woman (dedicated to self-knowledge, self-discovery, and the creation of a sacred space in the hassle of any ordinary day), about the Woman-Child (animated by living in the moment, by coquetry, enthusiasm, and playfulness). The Wild Woman was also present in her stories, as well as these archetypes’ shadows, their emotionally not fully matured sides.
So we live in a world full of archetypes, external and embodied. But when it comes to feminine patterns, there seems to be an agreement: combined, all the goddesses, symbols or architectural figures create four powerful aspects.
Four fundamental feminine archetypes, four stages of the menstrual cycle, four phases of the moon, four seasons.
Synched with the rhythms of nature, these archetypes are fluid, constantly changing, open to interpretation and expansion. Each one is associated with our bodies’ energy levels (throughout a month, a year or a lifetime), to our resources of creativity and creation, to the depth of our emotions, to the way we respond to the world around us. Archetypes present us with the subtle or loud direction life is tugging us to, and they also place us in contexts in which we infantilize, shrink or distort ourselves.
As I continued my exploration, I came across more Jungian archetypes, and then discovered women’s circles (gatherings meant to honor menstruation or a new birth, to mark moons, solstices and equinoxes, or simply women coming together to experience connection, to heal through story-telling, to strengthen their bonds by a shared physical space). I delved into workshops inviting me to uncover the mysteries of femininity, later pored over comparative courses of images of femininity in art side by side with women’s figures in archaeological artifacts, ancient myths, archaic symbols, characters from literature and cinematography, even tarot cards.
Next came Maureen Murdock’s Heroine’s Journey, then a full-year course on rites of passages from the immature Maiden into archetypal Mother. I started to see how society infantilizes women, idolizing only youthful traits such as “pretty, pleasing, and polite”. I started to notice how we fail to see that Mother refers to any creative woman, not just the ones having given birth, or how the Wise Old Woman is slowly being erased from language, culture, society. As I myself was entering pre-menopause, I learned to honor and respect the way my body experienced menstruation. I embraced this new phase of my life: feeling a sense of life mastery, a purpose; picking up threads of spiritual pursuits; living with intensity and renewed direction. I, the one who rolled her eyes at my friends’ crystals and affirmation cards’ altars, now have several small anthropomorphic statuettes, inspired by the millennia-old silhouettes of the women of Cucuteni. They are my anchors into archetypes.
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What’s an archetype got to do with a personal stylist?
Inevitably, I wondered if the archetypes manifest themselves through clothing and personal style.
How does a woman dress who, regardless of age, wants to express her playful spirit, vitality, creativity, imagination? (She embodies the archetype of the Virgin or the Girl)
What does a woman choose to wear when she wants to suggest maternal warmth, gentleness, inner strength, and life force? (She is the quintessence of the Mother or Creator archetype)
What kind of clothes, accessories, colors are suggestive of the woman who stands out for her serenity, wisdom, spirituality, and detachment from the pressure of physical beauty? (She lives the archetype of the Wisdom or the Old Woman)
Can a tight skirt, an impeccably tailored jacket, or a pair of high heels replace the armor and the sword for the woman who channels her warrior spirit, professional ambition, and the need for absolute freedom? (She is the Amazon)
What does the wardrobe of a woman who has assumed the role of a mentor or teacher for other women look like? How about the one who lives for seduction and sensuality? And the one who is always the dissident, the rebellious, the revolutionary?
How does a woman’s relationship change with her body, with her physical beauty, then with her inner beauty, with her biological age, with the interpretation of what “mother” means, as she integrates each archetype?
I have met women who remained stuck for years in one archetype. The eternal mother, whose life revolves around children and family life, whose wardrobe has become impersonal, devoid of femininity, life and color. The “party girl”, who refuses to grow up and takes refuge in sequins, high heels and dresses in bright colors.
I have also noticed a spiraling, repeated, labyrinthine passage through the energies of all four main archetypes when a woman fails to find the common denominator of her clothing choices.
It is how I explain why, in her wardrobe, she has a childish pink tulle skirt next to a pair of skin-tight burgundy leather pants fit for a seductive Salome, next to a bohemian dress wearing the flowers of all the gardens of the world, next to a black poncho that wraps her in the mystery and the darkness of a wintering soul. A constant coming and going, between too many stylistic types. Fumbling forever, in search of a long-lasting identity.
Consider the archetypes as a compass that can guide you home. They allow you to explore how you show up and engage with the world around you.
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Ok, but what exactly is an archetype?
Here’s the Oxford Dictionary definition:
- a very typical example of a certain person or thing
- (in Jungian theory) a primitive mental image, inherited from the earliest human ancestors, and supposed to be present in the Collective Unconscious
- a recurrent symbol or motif in literature, art, or mythology
In other words, archetypes are recognizable characters, actions or situations that seem to represent universal patterns of human nature. Each time we refer to somebody by a label, such as “Teacher”, “Mum”, “Damsel in Distress”, “Victim”, “Libra” or “Witch”, we draw upon the collective idea of the archetype. The label informs us of their most general traits.
Consider the archetypes as a compass that can guide you home. They allow you to explore how you show up and engage with the world around you.
It’s easy to create and become attached to a persona that embodies the way you want to be perceived by the world around you. It might be a persona that helps you fit in better, ticks the boxes of the expectations placed upon you, or brings you love. And it’s possible to so strongly identify with this persona that you lose sight of yourself as a whole. That’s where the knowledge about true feminine archetypes can help you (*and I don’t mean the invocation of the overused “Divine Feminine”, that’s BS).
You can work with each feminine archetype, you can activate and call upon each one, as they awaken within you. With some you might feel instantly comfortable, and feel some resistance to others. Some will support the view you hold of yourself, while others may stretch you closer to the edges of your comfort zone. Each one holds valuable insights and lessons for you.
The feminine archetypes, as I understand them, represent the initiations and thresholds you cross as a woman. Each one you dance with awakens more of your true self and helps you reclaim these parts of yourself that you’ve hidden or rejected because you believed they were bad, dirty, shameful. The archetypes will help you develop a greater understanding of the changes you go through this life journey. They will help you connect to your inner wisdom. They will allow you to dance with the rhythms of the life that swirls around you and within you, rather than feeling overwhelmed and at their mercy. After a while, you’ll remember you are part of nature, part of her cycles. You will find the way that honors your very essence as a woman: a way that tunes into the ebb and flow that’s been quietly calling to you your whole life.
Questions to connect yourself to some of the feminine archetypes
Connecting to the Young Girl / the Innocent
When was the last time you squealed with delight?
Where in your life could you do with more joy and freedom?
How do you feed your curiosity?
How does play look to you?
How do you express playfulness, joy, innocence through your clothes?
Connecting to the Rebel
When was the last time you pushed the boundaries in an area of your life? What was the result?
When you were a child, how were acts of rebellion/ boundary pushing received?
What does an “untamed woman” mean to you?
How easy do you stand your ground and voice your “no”?
Imagine yourself wearing a truly daring, bold, remarkable outfit. It could be a sexy dress, an all-red look or a tight outfit that outlines your body (no shapewear allowed). Daring means different things to people – but how would that make you feel?
Connecting to the Teacher
Have you honored your achievements in life?
How do you feel in communities of women?
Is there an area of your life in which you need to take more responsibility?
In what ways do you support other women?
How do you communicate, via clothes, your grace, wisdom, and love of life?
Connecting to the Wise Woman
What was the best piece of advice you have ever received?
What needs to be healed for you to feel complete?
How do you feel about aging and getting older?
What’s your relationship to death?
How would you dress if you didn’t care about looking feminine, shapely, beautiful?